Ramblings from a single girl

As a little girl, I used to think how cool and fun it would be to live the life of a pretty single woman. To be the fun aunt who buys her nieces and nephews presents, the super daughter who has a relationship with her parents, the sweet sister who finds the time, the christian who has time to study and pray, the caring friend that can listen and the lover who has a gaggle of men following in her wake but not caring much for any of them.

I got my wish.

No I'm not quite "all that" but the idealistic life I thought would be a blast is not without it's own downfalls. But then what lifestyle isn't?
For the most part, I'm happy. Life is free and easy. I don't have to take care of anyone but myself unless I choose to. I set my own schedule, cook my own meals, ride horse whenever I want to and never share my dark chocolate. But there's still a deep hidden longing to care, nurture, protect, guide, love.
Hanging out with young couples and their kids is great! Play with the baby and then give it back :p
Swimming with Crystal and Bre was lots of fun, I've missed my nieces. It gave Crystal a chance to relax and me a chance to hold a tiny girls hand as we walked over rocks in the water and rode logs like they were horses. I could feel the weariness of the constant need and care of that little one but I also saw the love and trust she unconditionally gave back. Even when she face planted in the water after slipping off a log.

I have to trust that someday it will be my turn and I will join the ranks of married life and make a small mark on the world through my children. But for now it's time to enjoy the freedom single life offers, time to work on myself and be available to opportunities and open doors that I would otherwise have to turn down. Time to buy expensive clothes and shoes and saddles. Time to do the crazy, spontaneous things before I'm too old and mature ;) So here's to the single life I always wanted and now have. May it shape me and grow me and not last too much longer!