Small beauty

There's a simple sweetness in the little things of life... Everyone always says to notice the small things, things we take for granted or see but move on so fast it's gone.

It's also the small things that can do the most damage. The irritating habits or common frustrations that wear us down. But that's why we need the small good things to balance. It's about focus.

Two days ago I was craving some nice dark chocolate, just a piece, a little bittersweetness. I came up to my room to go through my stash when I saw mom had put my mail on my bed with four little 60% chocolate bites :) Sixty percent is a little on the sweeter side for my taste but it fit because the moment was sweet too.

I've really been into sweet iced tea. I love tea in the winter but I never really drank it in the summer even tho I've always been a fan of iced tea. So I started making sun tea this week and I love it! It doesn't take much effort and I can control the sugar and it tastes amazing. Win, win, win. One drawback... Everyone else likes it too :p

I like swimming when it's super hot and you have air conditioning in like only two rooms of the house. I pretty much discovered this summer that I'm living 6 miles from the prettiest access to the river. I've lived here how long?! I really enjoy going down there now with some of the best girls ever!

Horseback riding is pretty much my life. It's my job, my hobby and my passion. Alone on a horse with the world open to exploration is the greatest feeling. I have solved so many problems while riding... Cleared my mind... And gotten stronger, it's unreal. So when I get to share that with someone and go riding together, I don't want anything more.

I couldn't sleep one night and I heard Skylee barking. She's been doing that at night a lot recently so I went downstairs to check it out. There was a huge black dog out there that has come around before and killed chickens. We chased him away but it amazed me that Sky would sit on the porch late at night, when she normally sleeps in the barn, just to guard us while we sleep.

Life had gotten me down recently; I was praying and asking God for strength to keep on. He always sends a peace even when I don't have the answers and it's always enough. His grace is sufficient IF you let it. It's so easy to block God out but I'm learning to draw on his strength. He has already conquered the world.

You can choose to focus on the good or the bad. You can choose to turn the bad into good or good to bad. It's however you want to live. Pulled down by the annoying little things in life or lifted up by the small beautiful occurrences in life.

For sale

Did I have to grow up and have to make the tough decisions?
So it was time to sell some horses, I don't ride all of them like I should and we have less hay for this winter due to the new additions to the family, namely calves. There's two horses that I don't ride, if at all so I put one up for sale this morning. She's already gone. I could have probably sold her four more times there was so much interest.
It makes me sad though, the dynamics of my herd will never be the same. My brood of horses that I have loved for so long is becoming smaller. I've had that little mare for 6 years and even though she drove me crazy at times and didn't respond to what I tried teaching her, she still had her place in my heart.
The horse closest to her was Fred. He is forever the gentleman, letting the lady go first, standing by her side when she was moody, looking out for her. The odd couple, he's my tallest horse and she was my shortest. He doesn't understand what's happened to her, where she went.
I wish I wouldn't have had to make that decision. The next one will be harder. Letting Fred go. Is this what it means to be an adult and be mature? I liked the carefree days of being the crazy horse lady.

Are all my blogs going to be sad? lol

Ramblings from a single girl

As a little girl, I used to think how cool and fun it would be to live the life of a pretty single woman. To be the fun aunt who buys her nieces and nephews presents, the super daughter who has a relationship with her parents, the sweet sister who finds the time, the christian who has time to study and pray, the caring friend that can listen and the lover who has a gaggle of men following in her wake but not caring much for any of them.

I got my wish.

No I'm not quite "all that" but the idealistic life I thought would be a blast is not without it's own downfalls. But then what lifestyle isn't?
For the most part, I'm happy. Life is free and easy. I don't have to take care of anyone but myself unless I choose to. I set my own schedule, cook my own meals, ride horse whenever I want to and never share my dark chocolate. But there's still a deep hidden longing to care, nurture, protect, guide, love.
Hanging out with young couples and their kids is great! Play with the baby and then give it back :p
Swimming with Crystal and Bre was lots of fun, I've missed my nieces. It gave Crystal a chance to relax and me a chance to hold a tiny girls hand as we walked over rocks in the water and rode logs like they were horses. I could feel the weariness of the constant need and care of that little one but I also saw the love and trust she unconditionally gave back. Even when she face planted in the water after slipping off a log.

I have to trust that someday it will be my turn and I will join the ranks of married life and make a small mark on the world through my children. But for now it's time to enjoy the freedom single life offers, time to work on myself and be available to opportunities and open doors that I would otherwise have to turn down. Time to buy expensive clothes and shoes and saddles. Time to do the crazy, spontaneous things before I'm too old and mature ;) So here's to the single life I always wanted and now have. May it shape me and grow me and not last too much longer!